For the fact that I am here. Sharing a piece of my heart with my you. Making a dream a reality.
With that being said, I am excited to share some exciting news. I have been working on a project for a while now and tomorrow February 27, 2019 will be the launch of my first product, The “I Am Crowned Necklace.”
However, before tomorrow’s launch I thought I’d share a piece of my heart with you and where I’ve have been with the launch of these necklaces.
The truth is I have been sitting on this idea for 4 years now. I’ve done a little bit with these necklaces here and there. Some people within my circle knew about them but even then I didn’t really talk about it. Why? Well, mainly because I was unsure. I was unsure about a lot.
I didn’t think anyone would care about a necklace. I mean do we really need more jewelry in this world? I’m not even one to wear jewelry myself so why even try? Yet, this crown, a simple symbol that may look like nothing, meant everything to me. It represents the two babies I have lost and me hanging onto hope that their lives are now Crowned in Glory. In return, it has felt like they have also given me that same life. To be able to see life and beauty in the midst of grief and heartbreak.
This is what I want other people to see and believe too. But would this necklace mean anything to anyone else? This was my uncertainty. This thought held me back. So many thoughts and questions would cloud my mind. Things like, “oh here I go, I just put my time, energy and money into something that holds so much value without even knowing if anyone will care?” How would I share it? How would I give it to someone? What would I say? How would I package it? How would I take pictures of it? How much would I sell it for? What if people don’t like my style or taste? Only if I can tell people I have future plans for the necklaces other than the ones I have right now. Do I wait to do what I want or do what I can with what I have?
That has been the uncertainty of thoughts and questions within my mind for the last four years and the truth is at some point in our lives we all struggle with uncertainty don’t we. We get trapped within our own thoughts that nothing will be good enough or that what we have to offer isn’t enough. When coming face to face with this reality. I had to tell myself "I Am Not Alone." Knowing I wasn’t alone within my uncertainty helped me do the work that I knew had to be done.
What I couldn’t see then, which I can see now, is the inner workings of every detail within this project has been there all along.
What these last four years has meant for me is nothing but preparation for this very moment. Understanding my heart and how to live out my new normal. How to handle and try to make sense of my own grief and loss before I could help others was a big deal to me. I have had to set some time aside to heal, to find meaning and a bigger purpose so that I can put forth my best effort and keep showing up even when I didn’t know why or even feel like it. My friends, my family, my husband, my kids, and the people who have crossed my path without even knowing the impact they have had on my life have helped me get to this place of where I am today.
It feels like someone has put a blind fold on me and here I am walking this thing out. I have bumped into so many walls already. The walls within my own head, the uncertain questions I think about, the scared out of my mind thoughts like...what did I just do? Did I really just say I was going Launch a Necklace? Do I really know what I’m in for? This may not seem like a big deal to you but it has most certainly been a big deal to me.
Trying to predict the future is something I can’t help but think about. I get lost with filtering through ideas after ideas with the hope to find my way back to at least do and try something. However, through it all I have realized this has all bee the BEST part right here, right now. It’s the THRILL of life. All this uncertainty is the way it should be. The knowing that the unknown is okay. Putting one foot in front of the other and letting something become what it is meant to be. If I knew every step I would have control and being a control freak is not how I want to live.
One of the first things I learned after my first loss was what it really felt like having ZERO control. Learning some thing’s in life can’t require you knowing the outcome. Learning how to fully trust in something way bigger than me is really what opening up my hands to the sky and taking that leap to fly is what it’s all about. Trusting beyond my existence, but in a purpose designed just for me. A message to get out into the world to let people know they are not alone within their grief.
So this necklace. This crown. The words written on the card. I pray it is put into the hands who need it the most. The ones who are searching to find meaning after tragedy and the ones who want to believe possibilities do exists. I am excited for this launch and I want to thank you for following along.
A lot of work has been poured into this project and I am excited to keep creating even more.
Don’t forget Wednesday, February 27, 2019 the I Am Crowned Necklace will be available to purchase. So please check your inbox and share it with those who you feel will be blessed by this message of hope.
Remember, the uncertainty is okay. Don’t allow discomfort to cloud your mind or else you will never know the lives you can touch. So what do we gotta lose? We don’t know unless we try. So here I go spreading my wings and hoping I fly.